Think twice before you judge a parent.
I can’t believe it’s already been one year since I held you in my arms for the first time. I still remember the day I found out I was pregnant. I was a total wreck, and I had all these doubts running through my mind. I just turned 21, I’m not done with school, and all I wanted to do was go out and party. But I believe that everything happens for a reason. If God gave me this chance, I must take it. If this changes my life, I must let it. This road wasn’t easy, but it was totally worth it. Happy FIRST Birthday my little one! You are the reason why I work hard and persevere through school so I can give you a life that you deserve. You have changed mine and daddy’s lives for the better. I will always love you to the 🌙 and back
This girl said it was “unmotherly” of me to call out my boyfriend on his parenting skills. Unmotherly? How is it unmotherly that I want the best for my son? How is it unmotherly that I want my son to have a good father figure, who provides for his family, instead of sitting on his ass playing video games all day? How is it unmotherly that I chose to stay with my son’s father instead of leaving him, despite all the pain and torture he put me through? Why does my son prefer me over his father when it comes to calming him down after a tantrum or putting him to sleep? Why am I working my ass off in school so I can get a stable career to provide for my son incase his father gets fired again? If calling my boyfriend out on social media is what it takes to get his attention to straighten his ass out then I will do it. I don’t want to be that mother apologizing to my son in the future for not putting my blood, sweat, and tears into keeping our family together.
People who say a woman can’t change a man are full of bull because I believe we can. If it weren’t for me bitching at him to get a job, if it weren’t for me bitching at him to stop playing video games, if it weren’t for me reminding him to stop driving so carelessly with our son in the car, if it weren’t for me to remind him to give our son his medicine, to change his diaper, his clothes, to make sure he’s well fed… then Franco wouldn’t be the father he is today.
That word, “unmotherly.” That is not a word you want to call a hardworking mother after everything she’s gone through. And that person who had the audacity to say that, that person who threatened to whoop some girl’s ass at my son’s first birthday party in front of our family, should really reevaluate herself, watch her mouth, and grow the fuck up.
Don’t mess with a MOTHER. Mother’s are built to be strong. Mother’s will stand up for what they believe is right. Mother’s will do WHATEVER it takes to give everything to their children.
I am a GREAT mom for sticking up for my child to have his father physically and emotionally present in his life. That is what I call being MOTHERLY.
Recently, your mother and I were searching for an answer on Google. Halfway through entering the question, Google returned a list of the most popular searches in the world. Perched at the top of the list was “How to keep him interested.”
It startled me. I scanned several of the countless articles about how to be sexy and sexual, when to bring him a beer versus a sandwich, and the ways to make him feel smart and superior.
And I got angry.
Little One, it is not, has never been, and never will be your job to “keep him interested.”
Little One, your only task is to know deeply in your soul—in that unshakeable place that isn’t rattled by rejection and loss and ego—that you are worthy of interest. (If you can remember that everyone else is worthy of interest also, the battle of your life will be mostly won. But that is a letter for another day.)
If you can trust your worth in this way, you will be attractive in the most important sense of the word: you will attract a boy who is both capable of interest and who wants to spend his one life investing all of his interest in you.
Little One, I want to tell you about the boy who doesn’t need to be keptinterested, because he knows you are interesting:
I don’t care if he puts his elbows on the dinner table—as long as he puts his eyes on the way your nose scrunches when you smile. And then can’t stop looking.
I don’t care if he can’t play a bit of golf with me—as long as he can play with the children you give him and revel in all the glorious and frustrating ways they are just like you.
I don’t care if he doesn’t follow his wallet—as long as he follows his heart and it always leads him back to you.
I don’t care if he is strong—as long as he gives you the space to exercise the strength that is in your heart.
I couldn’t care less how he votes—as long as he wakes up every morning and daily elects you to a place of honor in your home and a place of reverence in his heart.
I don’t care about the color of his skin—as long as he paints the canvas of your lives with brushstrokes of patience, and sacrifice, and vulnerability, and tenderness.
I don’t care if he was raised in this religion or that religion or no religion—as long as he was raised to value the sacred and to know every moment of life, and every moment of life with you, is deeply sacred.
In the end, Little One, if you stumble across a man like that and he and I have nothing else in common, we will have the most important thing in common:
Because in the end, Little One, the only thing you should have to do to “keep him interested” is to be you.
Your eternally interested guy,
Happy International Women’s Day
IM CRYING IN THE MIDDLE OF CLASS
I teared up. You got me.
Awww. That was beautiful, and important.
Before the clock strikes 12, I just want to wish my bundle of joy a happy 11 months! I can’t believe he’s turning the big ONE next month 😢 Don’t forget to save April 26th for his birthday party! Still in the process of sending out the invitations haha
Goddess of Love